The Inevitable Mind-Body Connection

The Inevitable Mind-Body Connection

As I share more about my Mental Health challenges in an open and transparent way, so do many! If you have Mental Health challenges? Here is a new blog and friend I have met who does the same … and he is very knowledgable as his posts are informative like this new post! Guest Re-Blog …Cat

The Inquisitive Mind

Why is it important to know that the mind and the body are interrelated? Why should I know about this in order to increase my overall health?

The anatomical and physiological knowledge of the human body has exploded in recent years with the implementation of the scientific method. Because of this, physicians are now able to specialize in several disciplines, including cardiology, gastroenterology, and pulmonology, among several others. People spend several years studying the human body overall and then spend an additional four to seven years in a residency to specialize in these organ systems, all because there is so much to learn just about these organ systems themselves.

There are also disciplines pertaining to the brain, which include psychiatry and neurology. These are no exception to the explosion of knowledge that has happened within the field of medicine and healthcare.

Even with this increased knowledge of how each component…

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My Author Interview By Terry of Author Shout. All About What I do and All About My Passions of Helping Others…

My Author Interview By Terry of Author Shout. All About What I do and All About My Passions of Helping Others…

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It’s not every day I happen to get invited for an Author Interview. I’m a wee bit shy since I do battle agoraphobia and I get a little nervous doing interviews. But since I have had so many new blog friends come to visit and follow along on both my recovery and my book blog, I thought I would take up the offer from Terry who owns Author Shout which is an amazing large reader site as Terry connects authors and readers together so readers can find many awesome new books.

The interview has been updated as my journey all began with one little book I published and grew from there! I hope all my new friends and followers will enjoy learning about “All The Hats I Wear” on my recovery and literary journey! And if you didn’t know?

My at-home business is promoting many fine authors and their books and can be seen on my other WordPress Book Blog of “Cat Lyon’s Reading & Writing Den” and home of “Lyon Media Services”…
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Catherine Townsend-Lyon is a Best-Selling Author of The Kodel Publishing Group with her shocking debut memoir titled; “Addicted to Dimes: Confessions of a Liar and a Cheat.”

Catherine’s Memoir is both an in-depth and raw look as she takes readers on a journey of many important topics that ‘touched’ her life, starting as a little girl into adulthood. Not a book on how to recover but an in-depth look of how events in one’s life, or past trauma and abuse, or even the ways of parental discipline can be some of the underlying factors to why some people may turn to an addiction later in adulthood as form of escape, numb hurt feelings, or just trying to cope with everyday life when not emotionally strong and haunting memories of it come calling…

She had taken a dark path, trying to elude that past childhood pain and traumatic events. She began using gambling as a coping skill and escapism into a “dream world” to forget, if only for a few hours the haunting memories of her childhood sexual abuse, parental verbal and physical abuse, and lived with undiagnosed mental/emotional illness for years. Shaping the “perfect storm, she became addicted to gambling with alcohol abuse right before entering treatment. So, something like gambling to be for fun and entertainment became her worst nightmare and almost took her life, twice!

Now maintaining recovery nearly thirteen years, Catherine has become well known in the addiction/recovery communities and is a loud advocate of gambling addiction, mental health, and why the expansion of Indian Casinos and State Lottery offerings needs to stop across America. Catherine’s featured in many mainstream media and recovery publications like Columbia University’s Media Release through the 2×2 Project “Gambling with America’s Health. Also was interviewed for “NAUTILUS & Time Magazine online article in September 2016.

She is a former writer and columnist for “In Recovery Magazine’s-The Author’s Cafe”  and after it’s sale was hired as a freelance writer and columnist for Keys To Recovery newspaper. She is also an “Expert Gambling Recovery Blogger” for “Addictionland”   of Founder/Author, Cate Stevens along with other recovery experts like the late Christopher Kennedy Lawford, Tommy Rosen, and Arnie Wexler. She recently handled all the media and social media manager for “Big Jim’s Bike Ride Around America” until Jim Downs was forced off the ride due to serious medical issues after 4 months of biking over 5,000+ miles.

Catherine, aka., CAT lives just outside Phoenix, Arizona and So. Oregon. She is married to her husband for 29-years. She is a ‘Cat Lover’ and has three, Ms. Princess, Mr. Boots, and Simon-Peter. She has no choice but to be an avid reader for her business, but she loves cooking, gardening, swimming, and rafting. She owns and runs an online marketing business called: “Lyon Book & Social Media Promotions.
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“Best Day EVER Meeting This Former NFL Pro ‘Randy Grimes’ of the Tampa Buccaneers now Recovery Advocate. #NFLCares Program

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Author Interview With Catherine Townsend-Lyon

 

Q. What question do you wish that someone would ask about your book(s), but nobody has? Write it out here, and then answer it.

Why did you write and disclose personal family experiences? Were you afraid of backlash or judgment from family and others?

A.  I feel that is what writing a memoir is all about. Since my book is about my life of many topics including gambling addiction and recovery and not a book of HOW to RECOVER, I wanted readers to have an inside view of how our family life growing up can later become some of the reason some may turn to addiction in the first place.

I, nor many people do not grow up in an “angelic” family dynamic. Some grow up in a dysfunctional or abusive situation. That was my experience, and later became added “fuel” to my gambling addiction. I wanted to “set the back story” so to speak so readers had an understanding of how many of us turn to addictions instead of knowing there are places we can get help like counseling or therapy when your “past comes back later in life haunting you.”

As far as any backlash, my family needs to understand this memoir is not about them, it about how I was affected by how I was raised and disciplined. I was also sexually abused as a little girl, and I stuffed that away for years without my parents knowing until adulthood. You will have to read my book to learn how all that turned out. So, you have to brave enough to share the good, the bad, and all the ugly if you are going to write a memoir without the worry of backlash. I am trying to help others through my book. For me, that is what I focused on and help others know they are not alone if this happened to them.

Q. What is your writing process? Do you follow a regular routine or do you have any weird, funny, or unusual habits while writing and what are they?

A. Not really. My first book came very easy to me. And believe or not I hand wrote the memoir in 6 spiral notebooks. At that time, I was not writing a book, I was writing for myself to heal and to see all that gambling addiction and alcohol abuse had taken from my life. The book part and becoming published happened a year later as “divine intervention” I say.

I then was invited to be part of a compilation book which published in December of 2017 titled “Ten The Hard Way.” And I have been working on my next book for a long while and will be about HOW to begin recovery and what to expect. The only weird thing? I love writing when it’s raining. But I am not an outline or draft type of writer. I just let the words flow out of me onto paper. More of a freelancer.

Q. Do you ever suffer from writer’s block? If so, what do you do about it?

A. I can thankfully say no to this question. One of the best pieces of advice I had received from another writer was, “write what you know.”

Unfortunately, I know much about gambling addiction, recovery, mental health challenges, and childhood trauma. All these topics have ‘touched’ my life and I advocate about passionately …

Q.  What is the single most important piece of advice for aspiring authors?

A.  I would have to pass on what was told to me in the above answer “write what you know or I feel what you are passionate about.” If you love animals? Write an animal children’s book. If you have an open imagination? Write a thriller or mystery. An action or adventure story.

I am a writer and author “by accident,” Lol. So I feel funny giving other aspiring authors advice. I am a book promoter/marketer for many fine authors of all genres as well, so one piece of advice I can give to first-time authors?

Your book takes many hours, days, and months to promote. Book sales and book reviews will not happen overnight, so don’t give up or get discouraged. KEEP Writing and Promoting your books!


Q.  What are your current/future projects?

A.  I do have a couple of projects on am working on. My second book is almost complete and will be a follow up to my memoir and a helpful resource for starting recovery from gambling addiction on how to make their first year in recovery.

Another I have been working along time will be a stab at fiction! It is about a woman who is being chased by her “addiction demons” in recovery and takes a Lighthouse Keepers job on the North Oregon coast looking to start life over and for some solitude and serenity in her life. But her past comes calling! The rest you’ll have to read if I ever get it done! Lol.

Q.  Why did you choose to write in your particular field or genre?

A.  I actually added in my current book with the reasons “how and why” I came to start writing in the first place. It was about the suicide of a woman at a hotel and casino 41 miles North of my home in So. Oregon. I read about in our local newspaper. Reading it lit a fire in me to see all that my gambling addiction took from me. But, no spoilers here. LOL. You need to read my book titled; ‘Addicted To Dimes, Confessions of a Liar and a Cheat,’ which is now listed here on Author Shout, and available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Books-a-Million.

Again, I write what I know ….Lol.
Balance is a challenge for me to fit my own writing time in as I promote for other authors. It is why it has taken me two years to get my next books done and published. So except for the compilation book, I am still a “one book wonder” at this point. Again, I sure do write a lot for several recovery publications and my own blogs.

Q.  What do you think is the future for independent authors and do you think it will continue to be easy for anyone to be a published author?

A.  I think we all know indie and self-published authors are changing the landscape of the “traditional” way authors get published these days. You no longer have to look to or be with a big publishing house anymore. Now, that is not to say they’re most likely are some self-published or indie books that may not be very appealing. (No offense to authors). As I have read a few myself and the authors are not writers, LOL.

However, there are awesome writers and authors producing some fantastic works and it is refreshing to see that all authors can now be noticed and praised for work well done! That is part of the change with being able to self-publish. I have promoted authors that were picked up and offered publishing contracts. So the traditional publishing houses are finding many good writers and authors. That is a great thing.

Q.  Are you traditional or self-published, and what process did you go through to get your book published?

A.  My current book was picked up by a publishing firm in So. Oregon where I used to live. But my publisher is a smaller independent publisher. I did, however, receive an awesome offer when it came to my royalty share. the Kodel Group are more like a “self-publish” helper. I had an editor and designer for my current book already, so they just did my format, typesetting, and upload through Amazon’s KDP Direct Publishing of my paperback and for my e-book.

Going this route was a more inexpensive way to publish. Nowadays most publishers won’t do any book promoting for authors unless you buy a publishing package, except they may send out a press release about the new book, so authors Beware …Be ready to set a budget to promote your books on your own. I do all my own book promoting throughout social media and PR releases through several PR services. Authors can promote for free at many book sites. There are many low-cost options to gain exposure, sales, and reviews. Just like doing advertising on “Author Shout” and others like awesomegang.com or bookgoodies.net …

Q.  Have you ever changed a title, book cover, or even the content of your book after it was published? What was that process like?

A.  No. The only change or difference that I made was to my book cover. I have two different covers that are the same, but my e-book cover has different colors. I wanted my e-book cover to have more vibrant Las Vegas catching colors. That was about the only change.

Q.  What opportunities have been presented to as an author you in sharing those memories? (i.e. travel, friends, events, speaking, etc..)

A.  Being a person of long-term recovery from gambling addiction and alcohol for almost 13- years now, publishing my book was my way of helping others with the problems as I had and was the only way I knew how to help others. By sharing my story in many ways like media, radio, and podcasts shares to others HOPE that they can recover from this cunning and devastating illness.

Many blessings and doors have opened for me to share my voice and writing and to have a platform to help inform, educate, and raise awareness of addicted and problem gambling. I want those who have never been touched by this addiction have more understanding and empathy for those who suffer. The opportunities that have come from people seeing and reading my book are have been many!

Being a former recovery columnist for a premier magazine called; “In Recovery Magazine.” I did many amazing interviews and articles of many high profile people who share their recovery as well and many have become friends and supporters of mine. I am now a writer for a premiere recovery newspaper out of So. California called; “Keys To Recovery Newspaper” and I am still an expert gambling addiction and recovery blogger “Addictionland” a platform to raise awareness and educate the public about problem gambling. I have a few more, but I am ‘humbled and thankful’ for all the opportunities that have come my way. These offerings help keep me in recovery as well.

Q.  What are your marketing, advertising, promotion strategies and which one(s) have worked the best for you? If you had to share your most valuable promotion tip, what would that be?

A.  Now this question is an easy answer! Lol.
Since I market, promote, and advertise books for many authors and my own book for living, authors can hire me for “done for you” set-up of social media places to be and a full-service plan that won’t break the bank here at “Lyon Media & Literary Services.”

I’ve been doing book promoting and marketing a long time and it doesn’t have to be costly. I do research often and keep up on the latest low-cost options and new media places too! I want to be able to help new authors learn ‘how and where’ to promote their books. Many of the sites to place book ads are free or you can do low-cost book ads or book promotions and giveaways.

There is no shortage of authors needing help as they continue to write more books, and why among other reasons why they hire me to promote their books.

My number one valuable tip? Layer your book ads when your book first releases. That way you will find and it will help build your readership through many book promo sites like Awesomegang.com or Bookgoodies.net . . . And Author Shout! Just a couple of my “go-to places.”

Q.  What field or genre would you classify your book(s) and what attracted you to write in that field or genre?

A.  My current book is a Memoir of my life with many topics discussed throughout which I mentioned above.

Q.  What do you do if inspiration strikes in an inconvenient place like (car, restaurant, bathroom/shower, etc..) and how do you capture that moment before it gets away from you?

A.  I carry a spiral notebook or my laptop with me everywhere I go!

Q.  Do you have a target amount of words/pages for each of your books or do you just know when enough is enough?

A.
  Now that I am working on books two and three, I am trying to keep both within 300 to under 500 pages. I also let my editor worry about that! Lol.

Q.  How do you think you have evolved as a person/author because of your writing and do you believe your writing has helped others, how/why?

A.  Yes. My writing has evolved so much since I wrote my first book. I feel the more you write, the better you get. Now that I am writing more as a profession as well, I have taken some webinars and use writing software to make sure I continue to become a more seasoned writer.

I would hope to think writing my book and my recovery blog for my book and where I continue to write my recovery journey in many publications helps others. We just never know who our story will touch or help. I wanted others who still suffer or are stuck in the “cycle” of gambling addiction that ‘Suicide Is Not An Option to Stop Gambling Addiction.’

Again, like the woman I had read about in my local newspaper. And like my own two failed suicide attempts when I was deep in my addiction. Suicide is never the answer.

Q.  Do you believe there is value in a Press Release, have you used any press release service, and what have your experiences been?

A.  Yes, I do feel a press release is very important and has value. Many first time authors can not afford mainstream advertising or hire a PR firm. So a press release sent out through PR websites is a stellar way to let people and literary media places know about your book and it’s release. I do them for my book promoting clients as some PR websites let you send a couple out for free.

A few I like and use are NPR, WEBPR.com, and NewswireToday.com are some good ones. I get some good results in books sales and book reviews.

Q.  Do you believe there is value in a review? Do you believe they are underrated, overrated, or don’t matter at all?

A.  Of course, there is value to book reviews for many reasons. Readers who shop for books, let us say on Amazon, they look and read reviews before they buy a book. I know as I do and I am an avid reader! Amazon emails me when someone reads a review I have placed and tells me it helped them decide to purchase.

Reviews on Amazon also helps your book’s rankings among other books in that genre. My book is still in the Top 100 in Paid Kindle E-books at #83 for Gambling Addiction Books. Rankings and tell us as authors how our books sell and compare to other books sold on Amazon. When a reader takes the time to write a review after they read my memoir, I use that as well if they leave suggestions to improve my craft as a writer.

Q.  What is your biggest fear about having a book published?

A.  This question goes back to how I answered your very First Question. I sat on my manuscript for almost a year because of fear. It is more difficult being afraid of how readers would react to my memoir as it is based on truth and is a real story and facts. I also had some fear about what my family would think even though I have been estranged from them for years. But I decided it wasn’t for or about them. My book was about healing and forgiveness for me and insight for readers.

Q.  What is the intended audience for your book?

A.  People in or reaching out to recover from gambling addiction, awareness of mental health, and those who had been sexually or physically abused, went through childhood trauma. Also for readers who want more understanding about these issues.

Q.  Do you find it easier to connect with your readers with the advances in technology we have today like social media? What platform do you prefer, and why?

A.  The Internet has changed not only the landscape of how authors can easily promote their books throughout social media, but the Internet has also changed how people can find information to get help from addiction and recovery support.

As a book promoter as my in-home business, the Internet has allowed me to work from home and make an income as I still have mental health challenges with Agoraphobia, Depression, and Mood Disorder, the internet has changed the way we do many things for school, work, and not just the bookselling and publishing industry.

Q.  What are some events you have attended or participated in that has been a positive experience/influence on/for your writing?

A.  Taking on paid writing jobs has boosted my self-confidence as a writer. That also helped me get the offer to be a columnist at “In Recovery Magazine.” And why I write for several other addiction/recovery publications. For me, it is two-fold. I become a better writer and I have great platforms to showcase my writing while helping others recover.

Q.  What are the most important elements of good writing? According to you, what tools are must-haves for writers?

A.  I really can’t answer this directly as my book was written very unconventionally. When I was writing at the time, I wasn’t writing a book. That all happened later on.
I do however recommend using some form of writing aide software which I do use.

Q.  Do you view writing as a career, labor of love, hobby, creative outlet, therapy, or something else?

A.  All of the above. Especially for therapy and a recovery outlet.

Q.  Were there any challenges (research, literary, psychological, or logistical) in bringing your book to life?

A.  None. Seriously. I had none as it all poured out and I just kept writing it all in my notebooks!

Q.  Do you proofread/edit your own books or do you send them off to an editor? If you send them off to an editor, who/what have you had the best experience with?

A.
  God created editors for a reason. Lol. My editor was Julie Hall. She works for our local newspaper in Grants Pass, Oregon. She isn’t an editor by profession. But she edits and proofreads for the newspaper. She had taken my six notebooks and performed “magic.” Then she sent the first 50 pages to a publisher friend of hers, and that is how my book made it to being published as Steve from The Kodel Group kept hounding me to publish as to help others!

Q.  What motivates you to write and where does your inspiration come from?

A.  For my recovery and helping others is what inspires me to write. If I can help others by sharing my story and experiences through words? That makes me happy. And what a living legacy to leave behind.

Q.  What is your most/least favorite part of the writing process, why?

A.  Since I do write a lot and for several publications, coming up with new topics to write about can be a challenge. Writing is very freeing to me. I enjoy it and hopefully continue writing and publishing more books to help others and for readers to also enjoy.

Q. Now lastly, If you had the chance to get one message out there to reach readers all over the world, what would that message be?

A.  A message of HOPE to others who suffer from addiction of any kind. We can recover no matter how bad or how far addiction has taken you. We all have that tiny sliver of light given by our Higher Power within us to turn our lives around if we want it bad enough. I have learned that recovery is possible and it works if you are willing to work for it. I will be a “work in progress” until my last breath, but the life lessons learned and wisdom gained has been well worth the RIDE!

 

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Books by Catherine Townsend-Lyon

 

      Ten the Hard Way: True Stories of Addiction and Recovery (Ten the Hard Way; True

Connect with more from Catherine Townsend-Lyon …

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A Living Master Shares About The Road From Addiction Into Recovery. Special Featured Post By Master Genro Xuan Lou, Laoshi …

A Living Master Shares About The Road From Addiction Into Recovery. Special Featured Post By Master Genro Xuan Lou, Laoshi …

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I am honored to share a special recovery post written especially for my recovery blog, my recovery friends and visitors to enjoy. Some true wisdom shared from a very special mentor. It is not everyday one meets and has the honor of being friends with a Real Living Master of our generation and time.

I also have the pleasure of helping him promote and market his amazing book as well titled; “Find The Seeker! The Pathless Path to Fulfillment and Happiness.” Truly a must-read and has enhanced my own recovery path! And with their E-book on sale on Amazon for .99 cents? You have nothing to lose and spiritual freedom from addiction to gain.

It is co-authored by another dear friend and Genro’s pupil Clifford Stevens. They both reside in Austria and together have produced a very powerful and authentic practical guide that all who maintain recovery can surely learn a true path to authentic living, serenity, and feel at peace in “self.”

I hope you gain some wisdom by reading this special post. I highly recommend you visit and read Clifford Stevens blog posts of his “Weekly Wisdom.” It is uplifting and inspiring.

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Addiction and Zen
By Zen Master Genro Xuan Lou, Laoshi

Genro Xuan Lou, Laoshi is one of the few living Zen Masters and co-author of the recent highly-acclaimed spiritual self-help book “Find the Seeker!” He shares interesting and unique wisdom when those are looking for their way out of addictions and into a peace-filled life of serenity and happiness once again. Learning to reconnect and find our true “self” is just part of the recovery work needed to find the authentic person before addiction made life unbearable …

Why do people get addicted (for example to drugs)? What can a spiritual teaching such as Zen – which some people wrongly consider to be unworldly and distant – do to reduce consumption or even get people off their addiction?

The orientation of people to lead strong ego-centered lives is certainly one reason for addiction. So many of the political, economic and religious activities going on end up inflating people’s egos until they are blown up out of proportion.

This is aggravated by tendencies such as nationalistic and egocentric tendencies in many countries such as “America First” (to name just one example), the mania to do and achieve and the idea that “everything is possible” if only we apply ourselves and the stress to compress as many friends, experiences, successes, achievements into our lives as we can. And of course, we are constantly confronted with examples of supposedly high-performance, “successful” and “happy” individuals.

Thanks to these and many other trends, and also to the misconceptions forced upon us by our own egos, many people see themselves as small, inadequate, insignificant, weak, poor and needing support.

The moment a person attaches too much importance to his own “self,” he degrades what he really is. Without spiritual support, without engaging in a spiritual search and the insights gained from meditation, it is difficult to clearly see and understand that any “chemical” support (e.g. from alcohol, drugs, smoking etc.) actually ends up perpetuating, propping up and enhancing a person’s own ego and is thus a dead end or will lead to one.

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Image result for free images of booze drugs….

The addict tries to transform himself from the hero which he or she is not into a kind of “avatar” by chemical means like the Druids used to do with their concoction to instill the courage to fight and the idea of invincibility in their soldiers. Miraculix (from the Asterix series) is a good and funny example of this – but addiction to drugs or alcohol or whatever is not funny at all.

Hardly anyone at all can improve his or her situation on the basis of the addiction. On the contrary, the high costs which are sometimes involved may lead people to commit criminal deeds, or they end up in prison or in rehabilitation. The addicts may see their lives in this relative world as being obstructed and their paths as being obscured. Addiction is a burdensome illness which robs people of energy and may make it harder for people to find their way on a path leading them to be clean.

Spiritually oriented people – or those who are desperate enough or are tired of suffering – can turn to spirituality as a path, a guide, a tough way out which they must ultimately go through. However, it is clear that unfortunately, there are some addicts who do not manage to kick the habit in this life and lead a normal life – which is also an incredible burden on their relatives.

A spiritual path such as Zen – or others – will throw people back onto themselves and onto the bottom-line “cause” of their addiction. And in meditation, you will be fully confronted with yourself and your “self.” And in the search for your “self”, you will not find it. There is nothing to be found here, and the “results” of the meditation – which nobody, no Master or teacher, can adequately put into words – could prevent someone from continuing to fall prey to the addiction or be victimized by it or to become addicted in the first place.

The deep-seated realizations gained through meditation can help you – with a lightness of being – to kick the habit of addiction and begin a new life. Your “old” life is present, seemingly overwhelming due to all the adversity and hindrances, but the “new” one can mean redemption, salvation, as the Christians say, or “enlightenment” as the Buddhists say, and other spiritual paths have their own terms for this.

There is no way around meditation – unless you have the sudden insight – which does not happen often – in which everything suddenly becomes clear thanks to grace, and you are set right thanks to the goodness of the Universe. For this reason, we teach people in Zen to practice the natural and simple method of counting your breath in meditation – which you can learn and do without the need for any addiction.

Namaste
~Master Genro Xuan Lou, Laoshi

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ABOUT ZEN MASTER GENRO:

Gert Beirer, who was born in Austria in 1945, studied Zen, meditation, Kung-Fu, Qi Gong and acupuncture in Asia. He was given the name Genro (“Origin of Joy”) Xuan Lou, Laoshi (Laoshi = “Spiritual Master”) by Zen Master Tetsuo Kiichi Nagaya Roshi. Genro Xuan Lou, Laoshi was named Zen (Chan) Master by the Abbot and Grand Master Kun Kong at the Lingyin Temple (Shakyamuni Buddhism) in Hangzhou, with whom he studied 11 years, by Abbot and Zen Master Shi Chan Ming in Wuhan, Province Hubei, China, and was also named Shifu or “Spiritual Teacher” in 2009 by Shi Xue Feng, Abbot of the Ding Shan Temple in Germany.

After returning to Europe, Genro spent decades as a therapist and business consultant and has been heading the Qi Gong Master School in Austria for many years, practicing in accordance with the Wuhan-Yangsheng style. Genro Laoshi has lectured at universities, appeared on TV, held seminars on a variety of spiritual and self-help topics, taught Qi Gong courses and published articles and books on meditation, Zen, motivation and communication, storytelling, body-reading, sexual Kung-Fu, autohypnosis, and many more topics.

Visit his Q&A on his Official Website and Page.


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Our Authors Are In The Media, TV, and Everywhere. Our Featured Self-Help Author and Expert Life Coach Maureen Scanlon’s Event Schedule is FULL.

Our Authors Are In The Media, TV, and Everywhere. Our Featured Self-Help Author and Expert Life Coach Maureen Scanlon’s Event Schedule is FULL.

Hello Recovery Friends and Visitors,

I am sharing my post from my Book Blog as Maureen Scanlon is a certified life and relationship coach but she can help those maintaining recovery with building self-worth, changing habits, and learning healthy choices as well. Meet Life Coach Maureen!

"Cat Lyon's Reading & Writing Den"

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If you have not heard of Life coach Maureen Scanlon?

You are missing out on some true self-help pleasure. Maureen has been pretty busy with book events as she released her very first written works titled “My Dog Is More Enlightened Then I Am.” And, yes, it is an amazing self-help guide to help anyone build their best life and help people develop personal growth and confidence, help you land that dream job or just work for yourself! Whatever area you need help with for your life.

She’s also a powerful speaker and lecturer. Since her new book released, she has many upcoming events, guest shows, and even magazine articles about her and the new book coming out soon! Her life coach business is packed and so is her resume’! Her is more about what she does and how shes incorporated our pets into her unique book and coaching.

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“Know The Odds” Is Seeing What I Am Seeing Among College Students and Problem Gambling. It’s On The Rise…

“Know The Odds” Is Seeing What I Am Seeing Among College Students and Problem Gambling. It’s On The Rise…

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COLLEGE AND PROBLEM GAMBLING  POSTED ON 

The summer is coming to an end and students are moving on to their next level of education, which maybe college.  Going off to college is an amazing time of growth, learning, and self-exploration.  Learning about all the world may have to offer shows many youths how limitless life can be.  With this feeling of limitlessness, youth may be unaware of problems that may lay ahead, like problem gambling.

Change for Everyone

Heading to college may be a time of excitement.  For parents, it’s a time that they get to see their youth take the next step into adulthood. It may be a time where they get to see their youth spread their wings and explore all the world has to offer. It can be an amazing time of change for everyone.

Anytime there is a change in someone’s life, there is an opportunity for problems.  Youth who are leaving home for college will experience many changes.  They may be living in a new place with new people.  Their school may be in a new community and not even know where the local coffee shop is.  They may be leaving all of their friends and family behind.

Risks of Leaving Home

All of the changes that youth experience has risks because they may be leaving all of their protective factors behind.  A protective factor is a term to include all things that help people live healthier lives. These include positive role models like parents or youth leaders, belonging to positive groups like sports teams or faith-based communities, and living in a community that is safe.

When youth move off to college, they may be leaving most if not all of the things behind that helped, they live wonderful healthy lives.  They’ll need these protective factors as they face a list of new or increased risky obstacles.

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Youth and Gambling

There are a lot of reasons youth may choose to gamble.

Whatever their reasons, there are a number of risk factors that can put youth at increased risk of struggling with problems from gambling.  Youth are at an increased risk if they are male and have other mental health or addiction disorders.  Plus, if they are already risk-takers and keep the company of peers who gamble and struggle with other problem behaviors, they are more likely to have problems with gambling.

Youth who come from families who do not object to youth gambling and may not understand the risks of youth gambling are more at risk.  They are also more at risk if their family has a history of addiction and/or illegal activities.  Finally, a youth’s community’s attitude towards gambling plays a role.  If the community lacks awareness of youth gambling risks and offers opportunities for youth go gamble, youth will see gambling as a risk-free

 

Problems from Gambling

Youth who are at an increased risk, have not been exposed to gambling, or don’t understand how gambling works can easily fall victim to problem gambling.

Problem gambling is defined as any time gambling causes problems in someone’s life.  Some problems that youth may experience from gambling include:

 

  • Missing classes or entire school days
  • A sudden drop in grades
  • Less interest in extracurricular activities
  • Grater interest in money and value of possessions
  • Winning or being right
  • Money is lost or going missing

 

Obviously, none of these problems are good for the success of a student in college.  Therefore, it’s important to take some steps to help youth make healthy choices for themselves. Include problem gambling when you talk and council your college-bound kids about drinking alcohol or drugs. Have them prepared for possible peer pressure.

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What YOU Can Do

As a parent or loved with a college-bound kid going off to college, you can make a difference in their life. There are things you can do to continue to guide youth towards healthier decisions and avoid the problems associated with problem gambling.

Communication:  Keep a strong line of communication open with your youth.  Show them a continued interest in their life and share the great things that are going on at home.  Keeping the lines of communication open and healthy will help keep you aware of their life and allow you to offer guidance when needed.

Education:  Learning more about youth gambling and problem gambling can only raise your awareness to warning signs.  Your knowledge can help you guide your youth as you continue your relationship into their next phase of life.  A great place to start is our e-book The Dangers of Youth Gambling Addiction. This e-book takes this blog post and goes into greater depth of what to look for and what to do.

If needed, get support: There is support available across New York State.  If you believe your youth may be experiencing a gambling problem in New York State, reach out to your local Problem Gambling Resource Center.  Here, you’ll be greeted by a dedicated professional ready to offer you additional information and resources about problem gambling and/or connect you or your youth with a trained clinician.

You are not alone, and they are here to help.

We hope your family enjoys a fantastic transition from home to college. With this transition, remember that there is help for those in need of problems with gambling at NYProblemGamblingHELP.org.

Also from any State? Visit The National Council on Problem Gambling.

OR CALL: The 24 Hour Confidential National Helpline

 

 

Guest Article Share by Amy Dresner ~ Writer for The Fix. Getting Through Life Events ~ Taking Care of a Parent and Staying Sober Through It.

Guest Article Share by Amy Dresner ~ Writer for The Fix. Getting Through Life Events ~ Taking Care of a Parent and Staying Sober Through It.

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How to Stay Sober Through a Parent’s Illness – By Amy Dresner 08/05/19


I won’t lie, the urge to fix from the outside is constant. The helplessness is overwhelming, the grief indescribable.

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I think it was about a year a half ago when my mother became wheelchair-bound and was diagnosed with dementia. The two trips to visit her in Santa Fe were so stressful that my bestie, also a recovering addict, started vaping for the first time and she still hasn’t stopped. We had five days to clear out her apartment, find her a board and care, break her lease, put her stuff in storage, forward her mail, and much more. I cried most of that trip but it all got handled.

My life is different now. My mother can’t hear well and she’s confused. She can’t walk or use the computer anymore. People bathe her. She calls me multiple times a day about the same thing. On top of that, I was suddenly given the “power of attorney and appointed Social Security payee.” I was in charge of all her bills, speaking to her nurse, speaking to her chaplain, and speaking to her social worker.

Role Reversal

If there’s one thing addicts don’t seek out, it’s responsibility. As an only child, I alone had to handle all of it. Sure I was sober but mature? Hardly.

I recently had to sign a form to approve the use of Narcan should my mother overdose on her Oxycontin. When the nursing staff assistant tried to explain opiates and Narcan to me, I stopped her.

“I’m …um…well-versed in Narcan. I’m an ex-junkie.”

I heard her mutter an “Oh” followed by an uncomfortable silence.

I’ve never had children for a sundry of reasons: my genes, my fertility, my financial situation, my shitty relationships. Suddenly I had a child and it was my mother. The role reversal was sudden and jarring and I recall rocking and crying and whimpering, “I don’t want this.” But it was all mine, like it or not.

My relationship with my mother was always difficult. I was resentful for her physical absence during my childhood and her emotional absence always. But suddenly all that resentment melted away. Resentment is a luxury, I realized, and as her caretaker, there was no room for it anymore.

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Dispelling Common Myths About Depression (2)

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Almost 50, with Zero Life Skills

Having spent 30 years of my life mentally ill and struggling with addiction, having to “adult” suddenly felt premature and impossible. It was like coming out of a time warp. I was almost 50 but I had zero life skills: No idea how to pay taxes or when to rotate your tires or how to hold down a “real” job, let alone handle all my mother’s shit. Sure I had other life skills: making a crack bong out of a Mountain Dew bottle or how to hit a rolling vein or manipulating people into taking care of me. But these weren’t so helpful now.

I was a grown woman but I still felt and honestly acted like a child most of the time. I still needed my mom but now she wasn’t available. I’d never felt like she “heard” me and now she really couldn’t hear me. I never felt she “understood” me and now she really couldn’t grasp what I was saying. I hate to use the “t” word but yeah it was triggering.

We had grown closer during this sobriety but now, suddenly, she wasn’t somebody I could bring things to. She became somebody who brought things to me and they were all “emergency” needs: Afrin, salted nuts, Nars concealer. My mother had always been particular, snobby, and demanding. That didn’t change. I quickly accepted all of these things and began to lean much more heavily on my father.

Gutted

Then, about a week ago, my father was diagnosed with cancer. I was gutted. He and I are impossibly close; he is my mentor, my hero, my best friend.

“You can’t go. You’re my person,” I wept pathetically into the phone. Everything good about me comes from him: my humor, my intelligence, my writing ability. And now he’s ill. Really ill. My first reaction and I’m not proud of this at 6.5 years sober, was to kill myself or get loaded. My brain screamed, “GET OUT.”

We all have those things: if “this” happens, I’ll get loaded. My dad’s death was always that: my hold out, my exemption. When I told him that a few years ago he said, “Too fucking bad, Ames. It’s in my will if you get loaded, you get nothing.” Fuck.

It’s all so selfish. Fuck his cancer, I’m hurting and I need to attend to that. Suddenly I was making it about me. I try not to cry on every phone call but am rarely successful. I feel weak and small.

I started to spiral, lumping all the bad on top of each other as we do: I’m single, I’m broke, I’m getting old. My parents are dying. But if I know one thing, it’s that a relapse would kill both of them faster than the diseases they were battling. It just isn’t an option.

Still, every day I have the urge to escape my body, numb the pain, check out. Not because I don’t have a strong program or I’m not connected to my higher power or any of that bullshit, but because I’m an addict and we don’t like feelings and we get high to avoid them. Six and a half years of sobriety doesn’t negate a lifetime of drugs and suicide attempts as my top and most successful coping mechanisms.

But if I’ve finally learned anything, it’s that it doesn’t matter what I feel like doing, it matters what I do. I can’t control my feelings or thoughts but I can control my actions.

When I’m Not Crying, I’m Angry

When I’m not crying, I’m angry. I’m so fucking angry. Fuck you, God. God never gives you more than you can handle?! Well, this feels like more than I can handle. And fuck me. Fuck me for having been a complete wreck for most of my adult life.

And then in between the tears and the rage, there’s numbness, where I feel nothing because it’s all just too much. I catch myself just staring into space, zoning out on the multitude of Pyrex dishes at Target. Not lost in thought, lost in nothingness.

I don’t think anything prepares you for the death of your parents. I don’t care how old you are or spiritually fit (insert eye roll). Sure, they’re in their 80’s; it’s bound to happen, it’s part of life, blah, blah, blah.

But you still never think it will happen. And when it does, you are suddenly faced with an aloneness that is inconceivable, an unending void that will never be filled.

I look back now at me mourning a break-up for over two years. What a fucking joke. You can get a new boyfriend. You can’t get a new mother or father.

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I've been through a lot of tough times, more than my fair share and these words are very true.

How I’m Staying Clean

I won’t lie, the urge to fix from the outside is constant. The helplessness is overwhelming, the grief indescribable. So how am I staying clean? Well, I started vaping again (judge away, fuckers). I’m talking to my sponsor every single day, I’m talking to my friends, I’m working with my sponsees.

I’m crying. I’m trying to be kind to myself. I’m trying to be of service to my parents and process my grief elsewhere. I’m calling friends and asking for support. Sure I don’t always answer the phone, but don’t take it personally. Sometimes I’m just too shut down to talk. I sleep and nap …a lot. Depression or escape? Does it really matter? It beats the alternatives.

When I asked other people in recovery how they made it through a parent’s illness and death, almost all of them said the same thing: They didn’t. They drank and used during the whole process to escape the pain and it was the biggest regret of their lives.

Whether the parent had known or not was immaterial. They were haunted by the guilt they felt and if they could do it all over again, they’d stay sober, give their parent the gift of being completely present, and not run from the feelings. I can and will do that, as ungraceful as it might be.

I said to one of my sponsees: “You are about to witness a magic trick. You are about to watch your sponsor go through one of the most painful times ever and not get loaded.” I think I was telling myself as much as her.

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amy-dresner.jpg


Amy Dresner
is a recovering drug addict and all-around fuck up. She’s been regularly writing for The Fix since 2012.

When she isn’t humorously chronicling her epic ups and downs for us, she’s freelancing for Refinery 29AlternetAfter Party ChatSalonThe FriskyCosmo LatinaUnbound BoxAddiction.com and Psychology Today.

Her first book, My Fair Junkie: A Memoir of Getting Dirty and Staying Clean was published in September 2017 by Hachette Books. Follow her on Twitter @amydresner.

 

Urges, Triggers, and Cravings OH MY! Sharing How Hard Early Recovery Is Dealing With UTC…

Urges, Triggers, and Cravings OH MY! Sharing How Hard Early Recovery Is Dealing With UTC…

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Hello and Welcome Everyone,

You are here to visit for a reason. You may have a gambling problem, someone you know may have a problem with gambling, or you are looking to be educated and informed about this disease and cunning addiction. Whatever the reason?

I am happy you are here! I visit many recovery blogs and sites and wanted to share a little as to HOW HARD it can be to stop gambling and oh those cravings and urges that may cause triggers to go out again regardless of the consequences.

I know, I’ve been there …Here are a few posts I’ve seen around the web to show just how hard it is from real people from Feed Spot and REDDIT. COM


Day 21 = 3 Weeks!!

The urges are still there, but the feeling of relief and desire to work through recovery are more powerful right now.

Actually feeling like I have some pride and dignity again.

Thank you to everyone on this Reddit site for your insights and stories. I’m staying on board here. We’re all in this fight together with the same desire… to be free of gambling. With you, working it one day at a time.

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“_ uck Gambling!

That’s my mantra. Day 6. My downfall was always complacency. I’d gamble, go broke. Swear I’d never gamble again then relapse after a month and go broke again.

Think of all the vacations you could take with your significant other, or family and friends. Think of all the people you could help in your life with that money instead of throwing it away. Think of all the new skills you can acquire with the time and energy put into gambling.

Saying this to myself as much as anyone else. Don’t be complacent in your recovery. Stay serious, stay steadfast and strong.

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Weekends are the hardest

But fuck gambling! I hope everyone is staying strong, keeping busy, and not gambling this weekend…


A Comment to this post:

Weekends are definitely harder for me as well, but just accumulating clean weekends and experiences without gaming has helped a ton. Looking back on the first few weeks, I was just trying to get through each hour on the weekend. I’m glad to have finally started to develop a routine outside of gambling and will need to continue to lean on that routine as football season approaches.

Thanks for sharing. Enjoy your weekend my friend.

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HOW TO DEAL WITH THE Craving and Urges To GAMBLE:
Courtesy of Help Guide Org – Gambling Addiction Facts.

Feeling the urge to gamble is normal, but as you build healthier choices and a strong support network, resisting cravings will become easier.

When gambling cravings strike:


Avoid isolation.
 Call a trusted family member, meet a friend for coffee, or go to a Gamblers Anonymous meeting.

Postpone gambling. Tell yourself that you’ll wait 5 minutes, fifteen minutes, or an hour. As you wait, the urge to gamble may pass or become weak enough to resist.

Visualize what will happen if you give in to the urge to gamble. Think about how you’ll feel after all your money is gone and you’ve disappointed yourself and your family again.

Distract yourself with another activity, such as going to the gym, watching a movie, or practicing a relaxation exercise for gambling cravings.

Coping with lapses:  If you aren’t able to resist the gambling craving, don’t be too hard on yourself or use it as an excuse to give up. Overcoming a gambling addiction is a tough process. You may slip from time to time; the important thing is to learn from your mistakes and continue working towards recovery.


Self-help for gambling problems:  
The biggest step to overcoming a gambling addiction is realizing that you have a problem. It takes tremendous strength and courage to own up to this, especially if you have lost a lot of money and strained or broken relationships along the way. Don’t despair, and don’t try to go it alone. Many others have been in your shoes and have been able to break the habit and rebuild their lives. You can, too.

Learn to relieve unpleasant feelings in healthier ways:  Do you gamble when you’re lonely or bored? Or after a stressful day at work or following an argument with your spouse? Gambling may be a way to self-soothe unpleasant emotions, unwind, or socialize.

But there are healthier and more effective ways of managing your moods and relieving boredom, such as exercising, spending time with friends who don’t gamble, taking up new hobbies, or practicing relaxation techniques.

Strengthen your support network:  It’s tough to battle any addiction without support, so reach out to friends and family. If your support network is limited, there are ways to make new friends without relying on visiting casinos or gambling online. Try reaching out to colleagues at work, joining a sports team or book club, enrolling in an education class, or volunteering for a good cause.

Join a peer support group:  Gamblers Anonymous, for example, is a twelve-step recovery program patterned after Alcoholics Anonymous. A key part of the program is finding a sponsor, a former gambler who has experience remaining free from addiction and can provide you invaluable guidance and support.

Seek help for underlying mood disorders. Depressionstresssubstance abuse, or anxiety can both trigger gambling problems and be made worse by compulsive gambling. Even when gambling is no longer a part of your life, these problems will still remain, so it’s important to address them.

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Dispelling Common Myths About Depression (2)
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How to stop gambling for good:  For many problem gamblers, it’s not quitting gambling that’s the biggest challenge, but rather staying in recovery—making a permanent commitment to stay away from gambling. The Internet has made gambling far more accessible and, therefore, harder for recovering addicts to avoid relapse.

Online casinos and bookmakers are open all day, every day for anyone with a smartphone or access to a computer. But maintaining recovery from gambling addiction or problem gambling is still possible if you surround yourself with people to whom you’re accountable, avoid tempting environments and websites, give up control of your finances (at least at first), and find healthier activities to replace gambling in your life.

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LASTLY:

 

Finding alternatives to gambling:

Maintaining recovery from gambling addiction depends a lot on finding alternative behaviors you can substitute for gambling.

Some examples include:

Reason for gambling Sample substitute behaviors
To provide excitement, get a rush of adrenaline Sport or a challenging hobby, such as mountain biking, rock climbing, or Go Kart racing
To be more social, overcome shyness or isolation Counseling, enroll in a public speaking class, join a social group, connect with family and friends, volunteer, find new friends
To numb unpleasant feelings, not think about problems Try therapy or use HelpGuide’s free Emotional Intelligence toolkit
Boredom or loneliness Find something you’re passionate about such as art, music, sports, or books and then find others with the same interests
To relax after a stressful day As little as 15 minutes of daily exercise can relieve stress. Or deep breathing, meditation, or massage
To solve money problems The odds are always stacked against you so it’s far better to seek help with debts from a credit counselor

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I truly hope this information will help many who may be in early recovery, thinking you may have a gambling problem, or to help someone you know who may struggle with gambling. Know you can always support resources page for more services or even email me at lyonmedia@aol.com support. I am always here to help others from this addiction, so do not hesitate to email me!

~Catherine